Filth

From both the customer's and bartender's perspectives, this is not your home – it's a business.  The fact that you're spending your hard-earned money, or trying to earn a bit, does not entitle you do live free and wild in a private business where other human beings are working and dining and drinking. 


Case in point? Snot rags.  It is never acceptable to blow your nose on Bev Naps and dinner napkins, deposit them on the bar and ask or expect your bartender/waiter to pick them up! Never!  Get up and toss the offending snot rag in the trash and wash your hands while you're at it.   


Condiments.  Do you really want to stick you knife or fork in that Grey Poupon or Heinz wide-mouth bottle, lick it good and double-dip?  Can you imagine several of your closest strangers doing that?  Yick!  You're tipping me but not putting caps back on is insulting.  Be considerate and somewhat clean.  No one's asking you to be an OCD neat freak – just respectful of others.  


Odiferous-nes .  Yes, I'm talking to all you patchouli wearing, 4-day non-bathing, free spirit anti-perspirant ditching, Drakar Noir loving, Rasta oil loving, non teeth brushing fools. It's nasty and insulting.  Nothing makes me gag or burst into migraine mode faster than knowing you've arrived from 20 feet away when you haven't opened your mouth to order, my back is turned yet I know you've arrived.   Be considerate.  


Tone that crap down – the incense oil in particular.  It's ridiculously offensive. You're in public.  


You can't not know you have chronic bad breath. At some point, someone has made their personal space more than 4 or 5 feet from you, backing up as your talking for this very reason.  Maybe it's so bad that someone has actually told you outright.  Google halitosis products please – nasty.


Similarly, I don't know what you do in your country, but most people here shower daily and wash their drawers more than once every 6 months. B.O. is a serious disease.  If left unattended, it can lead to the dreaded hold nose and evacuate, no service, bitter beer face, or empty bar.  Check yourself before you wreck us.  Invest in a $3 deodorant/anti-perspirant – PLEASE.


Barkeeps.  There live among you far too many filthy animals.  A bar rag is for wiping the bar down after most every customer has left.  As a matter of fact, just as waiters do, you should be clearing empty glasses and plates continuously and wiping dirty areas down with a damp rag NOT a wad of paper BevNaps.  Bar rags are not decorations nor are they the personal domain of your barbacks.  Don't be a revolting slob.  Nobody, I mean nobody, likes to roll up to your bar expecting to order a refreshing drink and stick their elbows in sticky sugar, smeared ketchup and molten candle wax while you flirt with the waitstaff at the service bar.  I cannot stress how important this is to your business and nightly income.  A clean bar is far more attractive and inviting than a filthy one. 



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