Idiot Bartender of the Day: Racist Edition – Jessica Elizabeth

Jessica Elizabeth… you complete me.  Oh Proof nightclub.. you had me at boobage.

So, the genius powers-that-be at Proof nightclub in Chi-town decide it’s in their best interests to hire a stripper-looking bartender to boost business.  They proceed to employ a stereotypical, bleach blonde bimbo; one with a perfectly matched, but ghastly, set of surgically enhanced, out for the world to see, double-dee endowments, an unbelievably even glow disgusting spray on salon tan, and fresh bleached teefs.

Now, I may be wrong (does an Oh God 360), but I suspect that the manager/owner who did the hiring, in this case, was a dude.  I also surmise that Ms. Elizabeth would stare like a deer in headlights, if I walked in and ordered a Perfect Manhattan, Seagrams V.O. Old Fashioned, or Knob Mint Julep. I’d likely be directed to enjoy a refreshing Jack & Coke instead.  I challenge you to prove me wrong on both charges.

I’m guessing that Proof’s plan worked as designed and that flocks of (1) testosterone driven, young men, flush with cash, as well as (2) Viagra popping older business men, both frequented the establishment in droves – with “high hopes.”  Things were good for a while.   We’re so predictable and highly advanced creatures, aren’t we?  The club and the bartender are both making crazy duckets.  The music is thumping, the bartenders are flirty, and the customers loose with cash.  Repeat business is what it’s all about.

Everything is hunky dory until Einstein the Mixologist outs herself as an utterly ugly and dumb human being.  She (1) let’s her inner Hitler fly (2) decries the centuries old practice of S.T.F.U. by publicly professing her hate of Black people and (3) forgets everything her Columbia Computer Science degree has taught her – posting some really vile shit about our African American brothers and sisters on her public Facebook wall, for all the world to see, including her employer.

In keeping with her exhibitionist credo, Ms. Elizabeth has idiotically left her Facebook profile completely open for Tom, Dick and Harry, in every crevice of the planet – never bothering to check or lock down her security settings.  Leaving the ethics of the content aside for a sec, she could have easily privatized even the one horrific post in question.  Let this be a lesson to you all.  Although you have a First Amendment right to say pretty much whatever you’d like, with the exception of threats to the POTUS, (1) it does not go so far as to protect you from opening your fat trap and affecting someone else’s well being, livelihood, income or reputation via slander (2) it doesn’t prevent your employer from taking disciplinary action if flapping your stupid mouth conflicts with your company ethics policy results in bad publicity and subsequent lost income.

Her equally loathing and racist friends join in the melee, supporting and cheering her on as she descends into her best David Duke freestyle.  This situation brings to mind my Racism article I penned a while back.  The reality is, unfortunately, that Ms. Elizabeth is not alone in her mindset and highly-advanced communication plan.  Sadly, plenty of folks feel exactly as she does and openly voice their hate at bars and restaurants.

Not surprisingly, her employer eventually finds out or is notified of her very public Intertoobs rant, and shitcans Barbie the computer and bartending wizard.  Their public line is that “Proof [nightclub] does not condone any of this behavior and it will not be tolerated.”  But you know, as well as I do, that the core issue is that they’re terrified of business sinking like a brick due to some really bad press.  I’m thinking that’s much more important than losing another dime-a-dozen, crappy, and really stupid, bartender eye-candy.

Let this be a lesson to you all in two regards (1) being a hater is just plain ignorant and asinine. The only class of people you should be prejudiced against are people who order Bud Light, MGD and Incredible Hulks without looking at the cocktail menu (2) use your brain and S.T.F.U. when appropriate.

I don’t rat people out but I’d be remiss if I didn’t point this psycho bitch out.  Furthermore, this ugly, ugly story is already in the public domain, via several well known publications.  You can read the entire ugly exchange here - but below, are a few choice snippets before Ms. Elizabeth locked down her profile – shield your eyes and loving hearts people:

“Wow.  So insane how one race of people can be so incompetent and disgusting.”

“Send them all somewhere I don’t care where.  They make everything dirty ignorant and can’t act like normal human beings.”

“YES. Fucking niggers. “

“…they really are apes and must not be fully developed”

“Should be entitled to NOTHING. They’re fucking animals.”






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