Real Customers of Genius: Miss I Don’t Know What to Drink So I’ll Ask You Girl

I went out after work for that “one drink” with the crew a couple of nights ago. We happened to be at The Crooked Knife on 14th St. That’s borderline Meatpacking District/Chelsea for you out-of-towners. After a bad-ass, long, hot, sticky, dirty, demanding evening on my feet, I’m all in for settling down at the local watering hole (once in a while) and kicking back before the journey home. Here’s how I get down: I double-fist it – mostly.

You’re looking at my (1) a pint of Magic Hat #9 and (2) a shot of Michters [with three cubes] – a decent rye with a mildly fruity nose, and a fairly smooth finish. Coincidentally, Michters is one of the oldest distilleries in the U.S. – dating back to before our independence.

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Ballers on Parade

Each and every bar/restaurant I’ve ever worked in, has it’s local, designated, after-work “watering hole.”  It’ a spot where lots of local folks head to relieve the “stress” of a long shift, having had to tolerate and wait on one idiot after another.  “Relief” is usually in the form of drink, or seven, or twelve.  The is place is about nothing less than rampant debauchery on a grand, grand scale.

Those of you who pursue economic prosperity through more traditional means, slaving away in a pressed button shirt, routine shave, and fresh-shined wingtips, have a certain code of ethics (usually written, signed and strongly enforced) that specifically prohibits you from engaging in life’s more “rewarding” ventures – the kind of activities that illicit “tactile feedback.”  The corporate monkeys have done everything in their power to provide for perceived equal opportunity, an OSHA-approved safe work environment, and curtail any and all sexual harassment harmless flirtation.  They frown upon, and will bring Thor’s hammer down on your ass with vigor, for any and all violations of said HR rules of engagement, in the event of things like:

  • Blatent grabbing, touching, groping, rubbing
  • Any perceived inappropriate touching in the workplace or off-campus official/un-official corporate function
  • Water cooler “day after” tale telling
  • The mere mention of certain body parts within earshot of another employee
  • Mutually gratifying requests for copy-room quickies, bathroom stall sports, and under-desk bobbing for apples