Meet Captain Obvious

Meet Captain Obvious (Dubya is his idol). Captain Obvious’ nightly stint at the bar is the culmination of all his life’s endeavors – his place to be seen and unwind. He’s got his Wharton MBA, a six-figure salary and obscene bonus via some hedge fund or obscure Goldman trading desk, and a new lease on the latest BMW M5. He’s also a card-carrying, staunchly conservative republican. But, despite upper-crust C.O.’s elitist upbringing, he’s got zero grasp on common sense. He’s got no clue fold a fitted sheet, re-ignite a pilot light, change a tire or worst – order a drink. “Uhh… give me a Corona [pause]… with lime!” Well, no shit asshole…

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